"Your son talks in his sleep," I informed Carter as I took his hand and pulled him off the bed. “I was kind of hoping it was hereditary. I don’t talk in my sleep and if you don’t either, then maybe it has to do with what he eats before bed.”

Carter held onto my hand as we walked across the room. “Sorry to say, I don’t talk in my sleep. What does he eat before bed?”

“LSD, shrooms, the usual bedtime snack for toddlers.”

Before we got to the door, Carter let go of my hand, walked over to the wall and plugged in a nightlight that was shaped like a race car. He joined me at the doorway and took my hand again.

“See? This is what’s wrong with the youth of America,” he whispered. “Too many chocolate chip cookies and not enough acid.”

I just stood there looking at him. A room full of toys and a nightlight? This man had thought of everything.

"What?" he asked, when I didn't move.

"You just amaze me, that's all," I told him with a smile as I pulled him out into the hall, shutting the door to Gavin’s room behind me.

We walked silently down the hall to Carter’s bedroom, both of us knowing without a doubt that this was the next step. I wanted to sleep with him again the first moment I saw him in the bar. It felt like this was a long time coming, but here, in this moment, it finally felt right.

Carter shut the door to his room and I reached around him to lock it just in case. Gavin slept like the dead, but he was in a strange place so I didn't know how well he’d do. Maybe that was selfish of me, but after five long years and no alone time, I think I deserved this. Plus, I’d much rather get a knock on the door warning us he was awake instead of him just barging in and asking why we were wrestling naked.

The only light in the room came from a small lamp on the bedside table that cast a soft glow around the room. We stood there by the door just staring at each other. The weird thing was it wasn't awkward at all. I wanted to take it all in. I wanted to remember every single second of this moment. I didn't want to just have bits and pieces of a drunken night flowing in and out of my mind. I wanted to remember every touch, every look and every feeling. I would never regret the first time we had sex because it brought me Gavin. But this time would mean more, because this time, I loved this man with all of my heart.

In just a few minutes I was going to be totally naked in front of him.

Oh my God, in just a few minutes I was going to be naked. In front of Carter.

Shit, I have stretch marks on my ass. Okay, just keep his eyes off of my naked ass.

He reached down and took my hand, pulling me to his chest. He didn't let go of my hand as he wrapped both of our arms behind my back, clasping our fingers together. His other hand came up to rest on my cheek while he looked into my eyes.

"Before we do this, you need to know something," he whispered.

He's going to tell me he’s gay.

"I am one hundred percent, absolutely in love with you and Gavin."

My lip quivered and my heart soared. I closed my eyes and tried to keep the tears inside as I rested my forehead against his. Once I got my emotions under control, I pulled back so I could see his face.

"I love you too, Carter," I whispered back.

A smile lit up his face and I brought my hand up and let my fingers trace the shape of his lips. He kissed me fingertips and started walking me backwards towards the bed. I loved the way he looked at me, like I was his whole world. I didn't think we even made eye contact our first time together.

When the back of my knees hit the edge, he leaned me backwards, holding me tight and lowering me slowly, until I felt the softness of the bed against my back and the hard heat of Carter against my front. His arm held me tight around my waist and he lifted me just enough so he could move us both further onto the bed. I brought my legs up and wrapped them around his hips. I placed both of my hands against his cheeks and craned my neck up so I could kiss him. The kiss started out gentle and sweet but quickly changed. I could feel his hardness right in the apex of my thighs and a burst of heat surged through me and dampened my underwear. Carter shifted his hips slightly and I whimpered into his open mouth. That sound must have gave him the "all systems go" signal because he pushed his tongue deep into my mouth and moved the hardness in his jeans right against me. I moved my hands down to hem of his shirt and slid them underneath. The heat of his smooth skin instantly warmed my chilled hands as I moved them up the front of his stomach and chest. I pushed my forearms higher to raise his shirt up the front of his body. He broke the kiss to reach back behind him and grasp a handful of his shirt, yanking it up over his head and tossing it to the side.

He raised himself above me on one arm, repeating the motions I just performed on him. He flattened his hand on the lower part of my stomach, his fingers slipping under the hem of my shirt. He watched his hand as it slowly moved up my stomach and between my breasts. I grabbed the bottom of my shirt and pulled it up, arching my back so I could get it off of me and toss it in the same direction that his shirt went. His flattened palm that rested on my chest slid to the side, running over the top of my breast that spilled out of the top of my red, lace push-up bra. I sighed, closing my eyes and tilting my head back as his hand engulfed my breast over the top of my bra.

"You are so beautiful," he whispered as he kneaded the soft mound, making me moan. Before I could think any coherent thoughts, his fingers slipped the edge of my bra away and his head dipped down so his warm, wet lips could capture my nipple and pull it into his mouth.

I was done for at that point. My hands slapped down onto his shoulders and my nails dug into his skin as he swirled his tongue around and around. How did I never know that there was a nerve that connected from my nipple right to my vagina? Holy hell! Every time he sucked I felt a tingle down there and it was driving me insane.

"You have too many clothes on," I muttered as I reached between us to unbutton and unzip his jeans. He pulled away from me and stood up next to the bed to pull his pants and boxer briefs down while I unfastened my own jeans.

Holy shit, there's his penis - his mighty, mighty penis that was going to be inside of me any second now. Does it look bigger? Maybe it's the lighting. This lighting better not be like dressing room lighting and make my ass look bigger.

"You're making me self-conscious staring at my penis so hard. It doesn't do any tricks, so I hope you're not waiting for it to juggle or anything," Carter said with a smile as he leaned down and hooked his fingers into the waistband of my jeans and underwear and slowly started to pull them down my legs.

Don't think about the c-section scar or the stretch marks around it. If you don't think about them, they aren't real.

Shit, he's going to see me naked. Maybe if he glanced away or closed his eyes, I would look better. It could be like that Old Spice commercial.

Look down, back up, now look at me. I'm a Maxim model.

"I'm just wondering if you have a permit for that thing and if it's going to fit in me," I joked, slyly resting my hands over top of the scar nestled at the top of the little triangle of pubic hair I had. Okay, I wasn't really joking. How the fuck did that thing get in there last time and why didn't I walk funny the next morning?

Carter saw through my actions and immediately pulled my hands away and held them down at my sides.

If I suck in my stomach any harder I’m going to pull a muscle.

"Don't cover yourself up, please. I love every inch of your body," he said sincerely as he rested one knee on the bed next to my thigh and placed a soft kiss right on top of the c-section scar. He loved every inch of my body before Gavin stretched it out like a rubber band on a sling shot. Granted, his memory of my body that night wasn't very clear, but I'm pretty sure he'd remember that my ass didn't have a map of stretch marks on it back then and I could very well teach a geography class with it if getting naked in front of students wasn't frowned upon.