But I remembered now, the way his gaze had been glued to Nikki Howard’s chest that day.

That chest was mine now… at least for the foreseeable future.

What did that mean? I mean, as far as my relationship with Christopher went?

The thought made my new chest feel a little tight.

Then I remembered something: Christopher had said I looked fine at the Stark Megastore grand opening. But that was back when I’d still been me, Em Watts. Would he still think I looked fine as Nikki Howard?

Somehow, I sort of doubted it.

‘So I started looking for you,’ Lulu went on. ‘First I checked all the usual places you might go to get away from it all — Bali, Mustique, Eleuthera — but there was no record of you there under any of the fake names you usually use to register—’

‘And that’s when she asked for my help,’ Brandon said. ‘And so I talked to my dad. Because, you know, if anyone was going to know where you were, it’d be my dad. But he was all freaky about it—’

‘Right,’ Lulu said, looking indignant. ‘He told Brandon you were all right, but that you were working through some things. Which, you know, I knew right away was total B. S. Because no way you’d work through anything without asking for my help. I always help you work through things. Like that time Henry put the cafe-au-lait lowlights in your hair, remember? So then I thought maybe they’d stuck you in a Promises somewhere — just for a rest, you know, because I know you’d never be there for drugs, because I know you’d never mess up your body by doing them, and so that the press couldn’t find you—’

‘— but you weren’t registered at any of them, so finally I snuck into my dad’s office,’ Brandon said, ‘and I looked through his stuff and I found your file and I saw that you were right here in the city, at Manhattan General on Sixteenth Street—’

‘You were literally just down the street!’ Lulu cried. ‘The whole time! So I went to scout it out,’ Lulu explained. ‘Because Brandon—’

Brandon looked sheepish. ‘I thought you might not be so happy to see me. About the Mischa thing, I mean. But honest, Nik, I thought you were mad at me, and that’s why you hadn’t called. And the thing with Mischa, I mean, whatever, she just won’t stop calling me, she wants to cut an album, and you know I’m producing now—’

‘But then when you didn’t remember me,’ Lulu went on, after flashing him a glance filled with annoyance, ‘that’s when I knew. That they’d gotten to you.’

It was hard to take in, this not-very-lucid explanation of what had gone on, from their point of view, from the last time I remembered being myself — the day of the Stark Megastore grand opening — until now.

But one thing was apparent. Something very, very weird had taken place that day.

‘Wait!’ Lulu cried. ‘I figured it out.’

Both Brandon and I looked at her. ‘Figured out what?’ I asked.

‘How come you look like Nikki,’ Lulu explained, ‘but you think you’re this Emerson Watts person. God, it’s so obvious! You’ve had a spirit transfer!’ she cried. ‘Like in that movie Freaky Friday!’

Now it was my turn to blink. ‘Uh, Lulu,’ I said. Seriously. It is a crime that girls like my sister worship people like Lulu. Yeah, she’s good looking, and she’s rich. And maybe — just maybe — she means well.

But she’s got the brains of a clam.

‘There’s no such thing as a spirit transfer,’ I informed her.

‘Of course there is!’ Lulu cried excitedly. ‘Why have there been all those movies about it if there isn’t?’

‘Lulu,’ I said. How was I going to sum up quantum physics — let alone biology — for this girl who so clearly had dropped out of school after approximately the eighth grade, if not earlier? ‘What you’re describing. that doesn’t happen. OK?’

‘But what other explanation is there?’ Lulu asked me, her brown eyes wide and innocent. ‘Obviously, when that girl was hit by the plasma screen, and you — I mean, Nikki — fainted, you two swapped spirits. All we have to do now is find this Emerson Watts person — who has Nikki’s spirit trapped inside her — and you two can swap back and be normal again.’

Brandon was frowning. ‘Except—’

‘No except,’ Lulu said stubbornly. ‘That’s how it works. I mean, maybe, since you two both passed out at the same time and that’s how your spirits got swapped, we’ll have to hit you both over the head to make it happen again. But we’ll be careful not to do any permanent damage. Also not to bruise you, because you have the spring shows in Milan coming up—’

‘We can’t,’ Brandon said, before I could interrupt.

‘What do you mean, we can’t?’ Lulu demanded. ‘Of course we can. Why do you always have to be so negative, Brandon? It’s because you spend too much time with Mischa, and she’s still bummed out about her last pilot not getting picked up—’

‘No,’ Brandon said. ‘I’m not being negative. I mean you can’t do the spirit transfer thing.’

‘Why?’ Lulu snapped, looking angry. Only, because she was so tiny and pretty, it was kind of hard to take her anger seriously It was like seeing a chihuahua growling. ‘If we need a spirit guide or whatever, I can totally ask Yoshi from my yoga class. He’s way spiritual.’

‘It’s not that,’ Brandon said. He looked super uncomfortable. ‘It’s just that… when I was going through my dad’s files, looking for information about Nikki, I saw something. Something about that Emerson Watts girl.’

I leaned forward in my seat — even though it wasn’t easy, since the couch was so soft it kind of enveloped you.

‘What about me?’ I asked.

‘Well,’ Brandon said hesitantly. ‘It’s just that, according to this report my dad had, when that TV fell on Emerson Watts, she — I mean, you — died.’

‘No,’ I said, horrified, shaking my head. ‘That’s not possible.’

Brandon looked like he felt sorry for me.

‘I’m just telling you what I read,’ he said. ‘Dad seemed pretty upset by the whole thing. I mean, even though those EGG people did it—’

‘Egg? You must mean ELF,’ I corrected him.

‘Whatever,’ Brandon said. ‘It was still his fault. Dad’s, I mean. He should have had better security.’

‘He should have made sure those plasma screens were better secured to the ceiling,’ Lulu said gravely.

‘Well,’ Brandon said, looking uncomfortable. ‘It was secured. Secure enough that it wouldn’t have fallen down if someone hadn’t shot it with a paintball—’

‘I don’t believe you,’ I said, cutting him off.

He shook his head. ‘I’m sorry,’ he said, ‘but it’s true. If anyone’s to blame, it’s those elf people—’

‘Not about the plasma screen,’ I said, getting up from the couch… but still clutching Cosy to me. ‘About me. Being dead. I can’t be dead.’

‘Oh, believe me,’ Brandon said. ‘Emerson Watts? She’s dead. It was in the paper and on CNN and everything. I even saw the obituary. It was in the file in my dad’s office with the rest of the stuff.’

It felt as if something moved over me. Nothing too massive.

Just a steamroller.

Lulu, who’d been biting her lower lip, released it and said, ‘I’m sorry, Nik. But I think Brandon’s right. I saw the way that thing landed on the girl, and she… well, I don’t see how anyone could have survived that. It squashed her. Like a bug.’

‘If I’m dead,’ I demanded when the steamroller finally moved off me and I was able to speak, and also pace the length of the loft, which I promptly began to do, ‘how can I be here? How can I be talking to you? How can I just have eaten that blackened sea bass?’

‘Because,’ Lulu said patiently. ‘I already told you. You had a spirit transfer—’

‘Oh my God!’ I yelled. ‘For the last time! There’s no such thing as a spirit transfer!’

‘God, OK,’ Lulu said, blinking rapidly. ‘You don’t have to yell.’

‘There’s got to be some other explanation,’ I said, still pacing. ‘I mean, if Emerson Watts is dead, and I’m Nikki Howard, why are Emerson Watts’s parents the ones who’ve been at my bedside all along in the hospital? Why haven’t Nikki’s parents been there?’