“One person’s disadvantages are another person’s advantage,” Tony said with his devilish grin melting her world. No longer did she feel large and awkward. Claire saw herself as Tony saw her. With her hand in his, he led her to the big bed, where his clothes and her panties disappeared into the pink puddle of the sundress.
Before she could consider or question, their world became one. It didn’t matter that her body and shape were changing. They belonged together.
Metaphorically—the wolf was at the door. Realistically—their life was upside down; however, in that moment, in their room, in their home, on their island, and in their paradise they had one another—it was a victory. Catherine had tried to keep them apart, and they had overcome her ploy. They didn’t know if they’d won a battle or the war. At that moment, celebration was their only goal.
“Tony?” Claire said as she nestled against his chest with the sound of his heart beating in her ear.
“Hmmm?”
“Tell me something.”
His arm wrapped around her bare shoulder. “I thought tonight was a no question night—a just about us night.”
She lifted her head, to see his face. “It is. I’m not asking about anything. I want you to tell me something.”
“Oh, you do? What do you want me to tell you?”
“I want you to tell me that we’re safe, that Catherine, the FBI, that no one can take this away from us.”
The amusement of her demand faded. She watched as Anthony Rawlings CEO emerged from the man she’d just held tight. She immediately recognized his voice; it was the one he used with business, the one that left no room for debate, the one she used to hate—it was the tone she needed. “We’re safe. No one—and I repeat no one—will ever take my family away from me.”
Claire kissed his cheek and settled back into the crook of his arm. She knew what he’d just said was beyond his control; however, she could pretend. The illusion filled her with the momentary peace she needed. Within minutes, she was sound asleep on Tony’s hard shoulder.
Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are .
—John Wooden
For the hundredth time, Agent Harrison Baldwin read the screen of his phone and wondered if he could avoid the multitude of text messages any longer. If he didn’t respond, would SAC Williams suddenly forget the tirade and possible demotion that was undoubtedly coming his way? There was no question, he deserved it. Harry had done exactly what SAC Williams told him not to do—he’d allowed the case to become personal. Harry knew that wasn’t true. The Nichols/Rawlings case hadn’t become personal—it had been personal from before he saw Claire Nichols in Italy.
Harry decided that his inability to keep his assignment professional was in part due to his own screwed up personal life. Unfortunately, he’d allowed both lives to intertwine—when it came to an FBI agent—that was never a good thing.
The best part of his personal life had been his more recent reconnection to his sister. Without a doubt, Amber was his closest family, and after his divorce, that was what he truly needed.
Throughout the history of time, Harry had been too quick to fall in love. Ilona was no exception, and when they were young and living the dream in southern California, there had been love—or so they both thought; then life happened.
Harry’s fascination with law enforcement started in childhood. He wasn’t sure how or why, yet from a young age, he knew that was the path he intended to pursue. It began with a degree in Criminology, which led him to the California Bureau of Investigation. Ilona knew she’d married a police officer and was all right with that; however, she hadn’t signed up to be the wife of an FBI agent.
Harry’s initial enquiry into the FBI was actually on a dare—a late night out with police buddies and booze; nevertheless, before he knew it, things started happening—he passed phase one and two of the testing—passed the skills tests—and received the conditional letter of appointment.
Although he and Ilona had discussed his aspirations, neither one of them fathomed the consequences or the repercussions on their recent marriage. After passing the physical test—background check—and medical exam—the goal he never expected to obtain was right in front of him.
The bureau had five career paths. Based on Harry’s education and experience within the California Bureau, he was selected for the Criminal Investigative Division (CID). This division coordinates, manages, and directs investigative programs focused on financial crime, violent crime, organized crime, public corruption, violation of individual civil rights, drug related crime, and informant matters associated with these investigative areas. Coincidentally, Agent Nichols was also in the CID.
The most daunting consequence of Harry’s dream job was the time away from his new bride. It wasn’t a gradual process—not something they eased themselves into. No—one moment, they were together every day—the next, he was gone. That first separation they endured was when Harry went to attend the FBI Academy in Virginia. He should say that, during that time, he missed his wife; however, the training was intense. During those twenty-one weeks, he lived and breathed FBI—and loved every minute of it. At least, during his training, he and Ilona could occasionally talk.
Following the academy, it’s customary for new agents to rank their desired locations for their first assignment. Ilona wanted to stay in California, so Harry made that his choice. With four field offices in the state, he used every one of his selections to accommodate his wife. Placement wasn’t solely based on preference; it was also based on need and budget. The Baldwins were both shocked when Harry was assigned to Seattle, Washington. Ilona didn’t like Seattle. The weather was too cool and rainy, and she missed her friends in California and family out East.
During Harry’s second year out of the academy, while still within his probationary period, he was selected for an undercover assignment. It was quite an honor; however, the assignment left Ilona alone again. This time, she was stuck in an area she detested and her husband was gone—totally unreachable for an undisclosed amount of time. To make matters worse, during his absence, she learned she was pregnant. Reflectively, Harry understood her isolation and depression. At the time, he was oblivious. He was too busy concentrating on the job. An undercover assignment for a junior agent was a monumental boost to his career; the experience was exhilarating, and his evaluations were stellar. Agent Baldwin loved the covert world.
When he returned to Seattle, Ilona’s pregnancy was visible. They’d had no communication during his assignment, so the pregnancy revelation was—to say the least—shocking. Harry’s initial reaction was less than positive. It wasn’t that he didn’t want kids—he’d never given them any thought. Ilona presented him with an ultimatum—his job or his family. Harry should’ve chosen his family.
He didn’t.
Before their child was born, Ilona moved back East to live near her parents, and Harry asked for reassignment to San Francisco. This time, they granted his request. Since that time, Ilona has remarried. The assignment in San Francisco made sense to Harry. It was the one place he could have his job and some family—Amber McCoy, his half-sister, lived there.
Although the two of them grew up in the same home, they weren’t close. Amber was younger, and the one with both parents. Her dad tried to fill the gap for Harry; however, until the FBI, he always felt something was lacking. Sadly, he recognized that he was no better than the man who contributed to his gene pool. Someday, the daughter he only saw in pictures would be faced with the same unmet need.