Char had gotten fired from her job, not that it mattered since the Titus family had more money than God, and now she was taking a honeymoon with Jake Titus, reformed playboy and GQ's Man of the Year.

Clearly, she'd gotten the looks in the family.

Whereas, I'd gotten the brains and less-than-stellar vision. Yay me.

"Beth! Beth dear! Come over here. I need your ID."

All eyes turned to me. Whoever said doing the walk of shame was, well, shameful, lied. This? Walking by both Titus brothers the morning after the wedding, looking like I hadn't slept and being with Jace? Let's just say it wasn't something I ever wanted to repeat. I felt naked. And not a good naked, where you feel free and happy and at peace with the world. No, it was a bad naked. The type of naked where people point and laugh, and you have nothing to cover yourself up with but your hands, and even then you only have two of them, so where's the justice in that?

I took a few steps toward Grandma and Jace. He looked too worried to be irritated that Grandma was manipulating. Maybe that's how she worked. She wore you down so much by the time she offered the little crumb that I'd like to refer to as the gateway drug into crazy land, you were so desperate to escape you didn't just take it and examine it. You freaking ate it and asked for more.

Damn.

I was eating her crumbs.

So was Jace.

"ID?" Grandma snapped.

I pulled my driver's license out of my purse and handed it over.

Jace rubbed his face with his hands.

"It seems the only seats we have next to one another that are available are in the back of the plane."

The ticket lady's pinched expression gave me the impression that they were bad seats.

"We'll take them," Grandma announced. "And I'll take first class with the honeymooners."

I wasn't really sure what was so bad about the back of the plane. I looked to Jace for help, but he was busy scrolling through text messages like someone who'd just taken a shot of espresso and didn't know how to handle the jolt of adrenaline that followed.

"Thank you, Ilene. As always you're so helpful." Grandma patted the lady's hand and smiled.

"Do you know everyone?" I whispered so only Grandma could hear.

"Oh, honey," Grandma handed me my ticket, "what's the use in doing the Lord's work if you don't have the connections needed to pull it off?"

Sound logic. Damn her.

"Yoohoo!" Grandma called and then whistled.

I winced. Travis cursed. Jake shook his head and seemed to be speaking in a different language, and Kacey just laughed.

"It's time to go through security." She turned her attention to Jake. "Son, hide your drugs."

"What?" His eyes widened.

"Kidding." Grandma pinched Jake's cheek and let out a giggle.

Nobody joined in. That shit could get you arrested.

"Sense of humor!" Grandma slapped her leg and laughed again. "Oh sometimes I just kill myself."

"I've tried," Travis grumbled. "No cockblocking."

Did he really just say that? Out loud? To his grandmother.

Embarrassed, I looked away. Who spoke to an elderly woman like that? Did she even know what that meant?

"Sweetie," Grandma dug through her purse and pulled out a tube of red lipstick, "I'm already finished with you. You can have all the sex you want. You too, Jake."

The last time my face had felt this red was when I was in the sixth grade and accidently tucked my skirt into my tights.

"Uh, thanks?" Jake answered.

"Besides, I'm finished with you two. My work is done. Now your wives can continue in my footsteps. Actually, that's not true. If I don't see great-grandchildren in a year, I may have to re-evaluate my five-year plan. At any rate. My eyes or the eye of Sauron—"

"Ah, Lord Of The Rings' quotes… of course," Travis interjected and pointed a finger at Jake. "That's what you get for making her watch all the movies after the wedding. You get an eighty-six-year-old woman thinking she has some sort of wizardly magic."

"As I was saying, the Eye is on these two."

Grandma pointed in my direction, and I could have sworn I felt the laser beam from her polished nail.

I stepped behind a very pale Jace, hoping that the whole finger-pointing magic would drain directly into him and leave me the hell alone.

I peeked around him, only to find both Titus brothers giving Jace knowing grins.

"Word of advice." Travis walked up to Jace and slapped him on the shoulder. "Don't drink it if it tastes funny."

"Also," Jake chimed in, "the law doesn't apply to her. So if you call the cops, know it will probably be you behind bars before it will be her."

"She likes Benadryl," Kacey added.

"And she will win." Char nodded.

"This game isn't about skill." Jake put his arm around Char. "It's about knowing when to admit you've failed."

"And failure?" Travis laughed. "To that one?" He pointed to a silent-yet-smiling Grandma. "Isn't an option."

"Best bet." Jake sighed heavily. "Put all your chips on the table."

"And then what?" I asked, curiosity killing me from the inside out.

"Oh that." Travis grinned. "You still lose. But at least by putting it all out there ahead of time, you know what you're losing."

"And what's that?" Jace spoke for the first time since getting his ticket. "A shitload of money?"

"Nah," Jake answered for Travis. "Something a lot more valuable."

"The question," Grandma piped up as she strolled toward security, "is never what you lose. But if you care that you're losing it in the first place."

"I think you've all lost your damn minds," Jace said, his voice hoarse. His panic-stricken eyes found mine as he rubbed the back of his head and cursed.

"I'd rather not make a bet with a convicted felon."

"Convicted?" Grandma gasped. "Bite your tongue! I'm just visiting until this little misunderstanding is over."

"I wouldn't call a white van with no license plates, a ransom note, and enough rufies to put out a gorilla a…" he put up his fingers in air quotes, "misunderstanding."

"Call it whatever you want. But I'm innocent."

"And I'm Charlie Sheen."

"I knew you looked familiar!" Grandma giggled. "Tell me, how's that sexy father of yours?"

Jace

The first thing I thought of when I got on the plane was alcohol. The second? All the sex I wasn't having that the media was convinced I was. Funny, because at this point,if I was engaging in said extra-curriculars with prostitutes, I sure as hell wouldn't be so dumb about it.

The only evidence they had was a scorned ex-girlfriend and Beth showing up at the airport with me. My publicist had sent me a text and said not to worry — as far as everyone's concerned, I've been meaning to take a vacation. All they'd needed to do was explain I was at a wedding and catching up with an old friend. An old friend that I hadn't seen in over ten years and had seduced right out of her bridesmaid dress. Funny, because I doubted anyone but Beth and I really knew that we'd met before. And even then, why was I vain enough to believe that, out of all the guys Beth most likely had had pawning over her in high school, that I'd be the one kiss she'd remembered.